Saturday, November 12, 2011

Thursday, November 10, 2011

I Need Adult Daycare.

Day...from...hell. I've had this teensy weensy problem since Baby was daycare. I've been on most, if not all the Blacksburg daycare waiting lists since he was born 18 months go. Every week I call them and ask where he is on the list.
"Not till next year."
"Couldn't even begin to tell you."
"4 years from now"
"Next December, thats 2009"
"12 years from now..."
"Maybe his child might have a chance"
What was I supposed to do? When I had my third martini one fateful night, call and register my zygote with the center? Geez!
I am weekly, running crying out of the Director's office, whimpering to her and her beehive hair, how hard it's been and how we've struggled, how I've had to quit a very lucrative job, how even my parents have had to go above and beyond and take him to their no avail. Shrugged shoulders and consiliatory faces. So...hear me... To anyone that is listening and lives in a Daycare center, charge $300/week and make it fabulous, you'll clean up. Trust me on this one. I'm sure its not easy money (like being a Yarn Rep for the Knitting Mafia) but eeeewww-weeee you'll make the cash. I've bargained with these Directors,
"I'll pay double! Triple! Cash up front for the year! My ovaries! (not sure a 40 year ovary is worth much). I'll make the staff cookies everyday! "
Nothing. I did go to one place today that did actually have an opening.(Bad sign!) And for good reason! As I walked into the kitchen, the cook was losing a phlegmed diseased lung all over the Tator Tots heading into the oven. I've never seen so many runny noses. I've never smelled such poopy diapers. I've never seen so many adults without front teeth.

So today hasn't been fun. But tomorrow will be. We are going somewhere super fun and I'm bringing my I'll be taking pics of yarn, yarn, yarn! Now I must sign off. I need to get a good few hours in knitting on my sweaters. American Idol on tonight. Yes, indeed.

Can't We All Get Along?

Sniff sniff...ya'll need to read the comments page from the "Bikini Wax..."entry that button pusher, "Funbuttons", has uncovered a deep dark secret of mine. I was abused as a child. Old crusty Nuns with moustaches, chased me thru the streets with rusty purple Boye knitting needles chanting "Knit! Knit! You must knit forever, and bash your future husbands in a future knitting blog!" Well, frankly, I've never really recovered and vowed to the Hairy Nuns that I would start a knitting blog when I grew up and carry out their wishes. Only one demand they made, knitting only with Red Heart Yarn, I refused...could Funbuttons be one of those Hairy Nuns out there to verbally slap my knuckles with the "ruler" ? It looks that way. So you see, Iam really just the victim here and I need your pity (and a hug) more than anything else. My negativity in my blog stems from the abuse I suffered at the hands of those cold blooded needle wielding Funbuttons of Death.

Beets Me!

Sorry I haven't posted since last was bloglessly, boringly, dull. I was waiting for Phabulous Phyl to get here for the partying to commence! We knitted, we pedicured, she had Martinis, I had Gin and Tonics, we gossiped, we watched Idol, we laughed, we cried, we refused carbs!

Last night, the Knitt'in Gals all met at Kabuki and caught shrimp in our mouths then raced home to see my favorite Idol, Chris, get sent home. I guess he really wasn't exactly Idol material, but I loved him, nonetheless...why can't an American Idol be overweight, frizzy haired, not classically beautiful, but rich with character?

The only picture I have of the Kabuki experience, half of us look forlore, saddened, and in mourning (hence, the black and white photo). I'm hoping Phyl and Mimi and Bel have better pics of the night on their blog...I can't remember now, Debbie, did you have your camera with you?

Completely pathetic picture
. Sorry everybody, I know I've let ya'll down with that. We actually had so much fun and at one point, most of us were knitting around the table. Hilariously enough, we were ignoring the cook setting things on fire and putting on a show, we were more interested in the other person's knitting! Thanks, Knit Sibs for a sake-filled carbless funfest!. And kiss kiss, Phyl, for making the drive and blessing us with your presence! Come visit again soon!

Scenes From Christmas 2007

MOMA mugs...

Project Runway Incentives...

Araucania Limari hat, a felted ball pin cushion...

My Mother's new Clapotis out of Schaeffer's Martha...

Mr. Cocaine's Berroco Ultra Alpaca scarf...

Baby's new kitchen...

Wednesday, November 9, 2011

Froggy Style

So I'm merrily, albeit blindly knitting away on Klaralund and I remember that my finishing skills suck raw eggs. I also make someone else finally rip out what I have done and finish it for me, lowering my knitting self esteem to new levels. So why not knit her entirely in the round? So easy and mindless. Jeez, really all patterns for sweaters should be written that way. Of course, Cornelia designs sweaters for Noro and Noro stripes a certain way and you'd lose those thick stripes if knitting in the round. Ok, I am rambling. And to make a tiresome story end quickly, I frogged what I had knitted thus far and I am going to start again in the round casting on 176 stitches to make a L/XL. Why do I need to make such a large one? Let me revise my New Years Resolutions...

1. Get Lipo
2. Get Face Lift
3. Get Boob Lift
4. Botox for frown line (had it done once before, made me look really friendly)
5. Get new 2 front teeth
6. Get Hair Extensions
7. Get Anorexia...but not Karen Carpenter bad
8. Get a Pug
9. You get the idea...

Oh and I've made a few necklaces out of I-cords and they are actually really pretty but zero fun to make so that won't last in my consciousness. Well, on the spur of the moment we've decided to go to Va. Beach and stay at the Hilton for some much needed rest. I love the beach in the winter time (yes, I know Beck, not your cup of tea, you like the flesh cooking off your bones...). Its so peaceful and quiet and cheap, lets not forget cheap.
One final note...I think Cascade 220 feels like Red Heart. Sorry, I know thats a low blow to such a nice company (Ho!) but there is a reason I paid $3.25/skein wholesale and imagine that they are making a pretty good markup themselves, so what is Cascade 220 really worth? 50 cent? Feels like it. I should have made the sweater in Berroco's Ultra Alpaca or Silk Garden or Cash Iroha or anything else for that matter! See Ya at the Sand! I expect to be taking long walks on the Boardwalk, eating breakfast in bed, and knitting my entire Klaralund in 3 days! It can be done! My fingers may be bleeding by the end of it but...MUST MAKE SWEATER!

Guest Entry

Yo bitches, this is Gina's best homey, bustin' into her blog to give a big shout out to all you yarn crazy ho's. We be chillin' at Myrtle Beach, tearin' up some books, avocados, and Nutella like nobody's bidness. Peace out - B.

Tuesday, November 8, 2011

Monday, November 7, 2011

Knit Lit

by Rowan is now complete and ready for a tank top and my favorite pair of Sevens.

I've got a contest for ya'll out book selection is getting really dire. I can't seem to find books to read that are funny, well written and interesting. I'm tired of reading about murder, death, dying, torture etc etc. So here is the contest, give me a book suggestion. I'll read it. If I love it, you'll win an entire bag of Noro Kureyon. The infamous yarn, known for it's long color repeats, brilliant intensity, and satisfying knitability. I can read a book in a few days, so help out a fellow knitter with a book selection!
Tips on what I will and will not read:

No Civil War stories
I Love Humor
No Harlequin romances
No poetry
I need Memorable.
Thought provoking, please.

Good luck and I can't wait to start reading! Oh, and by the way, there can be more than one winner!

OMG! Mohair Pants!

(Horror photo stolen from Yarn Ball Boogie)

Barack Obama: 'A More Perfect Union' (Full Speech)

In case you haven't seen the entire speech...

Sunday, November 6, 2011

All tests came back normal. So I'm not dying ri...

All tests came back normal. So I'm not dying right this minute of something. What a relief. My clap is coming along quite nice, as a side note...

Tell Me!

Tell me this child wouldn't make the best Ralph Lauren Child model!!!?????

Saturday, November 5, 2011

Bag Ladies and Yarn Addicts

I just have to say one, whew, what a day. One...fantastic...fiber...fest! To see some of my favorite customers, some even driving all the way from Roanoke to partake in Fiber goodness! What fun what fun! Yesterday, we had the pleasure of a visit from the Phylmeister. We all had Zeppoli's salads for lunch around the big wooden table, hoot'in and hollar'in, then we proceeded to caress yarn and fondle Suzanne knitting needles and kiss the cashmere, hug the Merinos, cuddle some Calmer. Out of the corner of my eye, I could have sworn that Debbie was french kissing the Jade Sapphire. Don't quote me on that!

Phyl got a new project (shock and awe), a little pink and green number for spring called Tahoe from Knitty...and a matching pink and green project bag to put it in...she also nabbed a Skull bag from the lovely Lawre O'Leary. That girl, Phyl...whew! What a bag lady extraordinaire. Psst, she might have a teensy weensy issue with shoes, too. I saw some needles in her purse, and I think she may shoot up, shhhhh...Who's throwing stones? Not I! (see photo above, her back seat, polite cough)

Phyl gave an entire bag of Debbie Bliss Cathay ( that wouldn't work for her) to Festering Head Case! Oh, such a love fest around here! Here, Bel is jumping up and down with glee!

Here sits pre-trip, pre-medicated Mimi (we miss you already!) focusing on cashmere and Ebony needles...trying to ignore the ciaos that has surrounded her...

All and all, life is good. And tomorrow another fiber freakazoid day, I'll tell ya all about it. But first a quick munch at Bookbinder's grille, probably the Salmon, a glass of Toasted Head shiraz and their Wedge of Iceburg with Blue cheese salad. Then, lights out. Exhaustion.

Thanks to everyone that made Mosaic's sale today a roaring success! Enjoy your new stash!

David Cassidy - Daydreamer

Oh Snap!

Please excuse my absence these past weeks. These are the things I'm doing:

1. Sleeping
2. Working
3. Facebook (crack like)
4. Ravelry (need I say more?)
5. Knitting
6. Reading
7. Bathing
8. Watching Keith Olbermann, then Rachel Maddow, then The Daily Show, then The Corbert Report

No more time to blog!
Sad face. And this blog entry took me exactly 2.5 minutes to complete. Oh snap!

I would drive this.

Of course, it would have "Mosaic" on the side of the bus.

Wednesday, November 2, 2011

Lace Knitters...Who are You?

Better yet...pause...what are you? You with your nimble fingers. You with your clear head and attention. Mistakes easily tinked. Eyesight of a God. Not bothered by distraction.

The knitting code on the page not blurring and moving and twisting before your watering eyes...I had wanted to knit Butterfly, the Rowan sweater knitted out of Kidsilk haze but 3 exasperated hours later, Sandy was commissioned to make it for me. I am one worthless Knitter. I will never be able to knit lace. Ever. Why, Gina, why?!? Well, it is quite simple. My home life is complete and utter chaos. Toddler Hell. Chewing Puppy Hell. Refusal to have a cleaning lady who steals from me so must clean own house Hell. There is no more space in my head or heart for lace knitting. Hay Hay, Sanjaya, call me on my bat phone...we need to talk.

Tuesday, November 1, 2011


My Gaud, I love this family so much...oh, sigh. Alot has been going on around here at Chez Skein. A bunch of knitting, alot of exercising (weights too), reading a book a day, picking up toys...but I have to say, that I fear my blogging days are getting close to an end. Sometimes blogging feels like a monkey on my more obligation. And everyone knows that if I feel like I have to do something, I'm not going to do it. Period. Ravelry has been a more worthwhile computer time suck for me. The only reason to continue is to keep my friends close, so they have an idea what is going on in my life. I'm also working on a new venture that I hope will work out. I'll fill you in as events unfold. Kisskiss!