Friday, December 10, 2010

Antidote to Alienation

"A lot of human hobbies, from knitting sweaters to building model airplanes, are probably rooted in the same human desire to control an entire process of manufacture. Karl Marx called it the antidote to alienation."
-"Animal, Vegetable, Miracle"
Barbara Kingsolver

Monday, December 6, 2010

Knitting With Tree Trunks

Hello. 6 rows away from finishing my Juliet, the urge to knit a seed stitch scarf out of Colinette Point Five on size 19 needles, hit me like a ton of bricks.

Sometimes only Point Five will do...and I know, you know, what I'm talking about...brilliant color, 2 hour scarf, mindless, instant gratification. Thank you and goodbye.

New Contest! Name That Photo!

Here are some background tips that will make it more fun for you to name this photo. I'm looking for a Title for this photo, not a Caption. Ok. Here we go...

This is a picture of Annie Modesitt.
She is a famous knitwear designer, with multiple bestselling knitting books.
She put a purse on her head.
And then she sang a Russian song.
There. You have everything you need to win...

A Beautiful Black Bella bag from Jordana Paige! A stunning handbag that looks like a stylish handbag...but is actually a knitting bag! I love mine so much and I know you'll love yours! Good luck everyone. Please only one entry per person! Thanks for playing and I'll announce the winner on Monday morning am!

Thursday, December 2, 2010

Wednesday, December 1, 2010

What Lovely Cables You Have Alexa!

Yesterday UPS brought the shop a tiny unassuming box. Little. From Rowan. Must be a backorder from the order I wrote with Peter weeks ago. I opened it up and peered inside, 3 bags of Calmer. Cream, Black, Cranberry. The color of the inner folds of a beautiful English rose. Oh no. It wasn't possible. No. Leave it alone. Don't think about Alexa from Debbie Bliss that Phyl started. Put it out of your mind. Think about Baseball, torture, warts...oops, too late. The Calmer slipped into my knitting bag along with Debbie's Stella book. Done. I won't look back. I'm exhausted by all these projects. Its starting to really wear me down. Some have got to be finished soon or I'll have to go to a "resting place" for awhile. I'll see visitors while I'm there, but check your knitting bag at the door. I don't want to get any funny ideas.

All White girls on American Idol need to go home. Bubye, you all Suck! Especially sucky...

They are both pretty, but it's a singing competition! (spoken in an annoyed english accent).

Today Rivka came by and, surprise, sold me alot of yarn...even though I didn't need any! (what's new?). I got some Schaefer handdyed yarn, cash and carry, so it is already priced and on the shelf. These were limited unreplicable skeins. So beautiful! I got the new Twinkle yarn from Classic Elite, some new colors of Jade Sapphire's Lacy Lamb and Claudia Handpaints, and some Suzanne Needles (thanks, Knitress) and Collage square needles.
So the boxes will be rolling on in...Thanks, Rivka! See you in May! I'll take pics of the Schaefer yarn tomorrow for your drooling pleasure.

Monday, November 8, 2010

They Grow Up So Fast!

Baby and his future Bride.

Juliet, Juliet! Where For Art Thou?

I have an entire 1800 approx. square feet of yarn at my disposal. 24 hours a day. And yet, I'm unable to find just the right yarn for this sweater I want to knit. In fact, I've started and frogged it 5 times, already. The yarn needs to be a bulky weight or 2-strands held together on a size 10.5 needle. The sweater is short sleeved. I can not knit this out of fuzzy, furry, heavy(alpaca), scratchy, woolly, multi-colored, striped, yarn. I cannot knit another sweater in any Debbie Bliss Cashmerino yarn or I'll gouge my own eyeballs out. I'll jump out of a basement window! I'll slit my wrists with a butter knife! I swear I will! There is not a single solid bulky unwoolly ball of goodness in the entire shop.

This Zephyr pattern is so cute...I broke down and ordered Tahki Bunny in 8 colors. That's the yarn that Wendy over at Knit and Tonic did hers out of. I should get it next week. I'm holding my breath. Gaud, I'm a miserable wretch.

Good thing I have my new i-phone. It will be sleeping with me tonight so I can kiss it every so often during the night. Don't call me.

Sunday, November 7, 2010

Contest! Contest! Name That Photo!

Name this photo! What's the prize? An Entire bag of Noro Kureyon. You can't resist the wooly goodnees of Eisaku's color extravaganza! Good Luck, Knitters!

Cross Your Fingers

Tomorrow is my Amniocentesis. What else can I say? I'm nervous, even though I won't find out anything until 7 or so days later. I guess tomorrow I'll also find out if the baby is a girl or a boy...which is somehow significant, in a way I can't explain.

Wednesday, November 3, 2010

In One Ear and Out the Other

We have a Winner! Lawre! Come into the shop to get your Jitterbug! Congrats! This was a tough one. There was a plethora of fantastic titles, it was sincerely a very hard choice for me. But since I know these women personally, the title fit perfectly (if you get my drift!)
Close but no cigar...

Jessica K + Alice's
"Mosaic Mamas"
Mary's "Leanin' pile o'knitters"
Jody's "Happy, Dopey, Sleepy, and Doc"
Aunt Chrissy's "Did someone mention...squares?"
Becca's "Knitter Dominos"
Julie's "Is that a skein of Colinette Jitterbug in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?

So many great ones! Thanks to all who played! Another contest around the bend!

Tuesday, November 2, 2010

The Love Affair Continues

I feel that this country is starting to split apart, and not in a good way. Not in a "Agree to disagree" way. In a violent, angry, hostile, way.

Tuesday, October 12, 2010

Friends, compatriots, fellow-lamenters, We are writing to you

Friends, compatriots, fellow-lamenters,

We are writing to you because of the fury and dread we have felt since the announcement of Sarah Palin as the Vice-Presidential candidate for the Republican Party. We believe that this terrible decision has surpassed mere partisanship, and that it is a dangerous farce—on the part of a rudderless Presidential candidate—that has a real possibility of becoming fact.

Perhaps like us, as American women, you share the fear of what Ms. Palin and her professed beliefs and proven record could lead to for ourselves and for our present or future daughters. To date, she is against sex education, birth control, the pro-choice platform, environmental protection, alternative energy development, freedom of speech (as mayor she wanted to ban books and attempted to fire the librarian who stood against her), gun control, the separation of church and state, and polar bears. To say nothing of her complete lack of real preparation to become the
second-most-powerful person on the planet.

We want to clarify that we are not against Sarah Palin as a woman, a mother, or, for that matter, a parent of a pregnant teenager, but solely as a rash, incompetent, and all together devastating choice for Vice President. Ms. Palin's political views are in every way a slap in the face to the accomplishments that our mothers and grandmothers and great-grandmothers so fiercely fought for, and that we've so demonstrably benefited from.

First and foremost, Ms. Palin does not represent us. She does not demonstrate or uphold our interests as American women. It is presumed that the inclusion of a woman on the Republican ticket could win over women voters. We want to disagree, publicly.

Therefore, we invite you to reply here < > with a short, succinct message about why you, as a woman living in this country, do not support this candidate as second-in-command for our nation.

Please include your name (last initial is fine), age, and place of residence.

We will post your responses on a blog called "Women Against Sarah Palin," which we intend to publicize as widely as possible. Please send us your reply at your earliest convenience—the greater the volume of responses we receive, the stronger our message will be.

Thank you for your time and action.



Quinn Latimer and Lyra Kilston
New York, NY

***PLEASE FORWARD WIDELY!* If you send this to 20 women in the next hour, you could be blessed with a country that takes your concerns seriously. Stranger things have happened.

Saturday, October 9, 2010

I'm In Love...And I Don't Care Who Knows!

If you are a Vegetarian or animal rights activist...look away! Is there a sexier, more masculine, testosterone filled creature on this planet?

Do You Know What This Is?

Hint: It's knitted and inspired by "The Godfather"

Wednesday, October 6, 2010

Thank God for Maternity Jeans

Yes, I am still wearing maternity jeans. I cannot wear a normal waist band. For some reason, I wear a 12 dress size, but an obese size 24 waist. I am a hideous beast. In fact, here is a picture of a coffee mug that a friend gave me as a gift one year for my birthday, saying it resembled me in the morning. Should I be offended? Flattered? I think the nose is all wrong. But can any of us really see ourselves the way others see us? Clearly my friend sees a pretty picture. Speaking of another super egoboosting friend, Julie took me to BookBinder's Grill for my Birthday dinner tonight. My birthday was Sept. 7. Anywho, I've been feeling particularly ugly lately so I wore some sexy shoes to dinner...

And I started a new project...Eunny's Endpaper Mits...

Starting a new project really scratches that itch, if you know what I mean. I think I'm in such a funk partly because,
I'm Fat. My teeth are stained with red wine. Permanently. I have no clothes that fit. My feet hurt. And I came across some press for my Xbestfriend from highschool, Challen Cates, living in Hollywood, a producer and actress and awfully pretty.

I feel like a dork about that though, because she chose her life and I chose mine. I need to be thankful for everything I have, even the maternity jeans I'm wearing right now. When I'm holding my sleeping son in my arms, with a little black pug curled up at my side snoring away, and the man I love, rubbing my feet...what else is there?
I don't want anything else.
On a lighter note, thankfully, I don't have to work at TNNA in San Diego this year. Whew. What would I be doing right now? Eating my 8th course of dinner with 27 people until midnight tonight. Do miss the wine though, Jay knew himself some wine. And the conversation was pretty interesting. Oh Vey. Still glad I'm here and not there.

Pink Eye Sux

Tuesday, October 5, 2010

Self Confessed Noro Addict

I'm really loving this project I'm knitting right now. I'm alternating every 2 rows with 2 different colors of Noro's Silk Garden. 60 stitches, K1 P1 ribbing every row on a size 6 needle. It is such an elegant and sophisticated scarf, and I'm enjoying watching it grow and seeing how the colors express themselves.

The amazing thing about color selection is that it matters not, which 2 colors you choose. Any combination is stunning. Close your eyes and randomly pick colors. Breathtaking. Unisexed. Subtle and magnificent. Feast for the eyes.

I'm not going to stop knitting this until I can wrap it around my neck twice and it hits my knees. Thank you very much.

Getting Ready For Purl Jam

I'm sprucing up the patio with pretty annuals and such, in preparation for my in-laws and a private party. On Saturday night, Mr. Cocaine and I are serving cocktails and heavy hors d'oeuvres for my employees and the designers of the Jam, Cornelia T Hamilton, Jared Flood, and Annie Modesitt. It will be really fun for my staff to get to know these extraordinary talents. But there is so much time and so little to do! Oops, reverse that.

Sunday, October 3, 2010

Got Checked Under The Hood

Today was one of those particularly unpleasant days we women have to deal with...

a pap smear
a mammogram (which is always a blast when you have Fibrocystic Breast Disease)
a rectal exam (Hello there!)
and the Doctor telling me my thyroid glands seem swollen.

So, tomorrow I get blood work done, a glucose test and a thyroid test.

I hate getting old...but prefer it over the alternative.

The end is in sight...